Ban These People

Dear Diary …

Some things just don’t belong in this world, but for whatever reason, some people just don’t get it and they do it anyway. But fear not, Diary, I am here to make the new mandates and hopefully make people aware of how badly they’re screwing up.

Today in Zackmerica I am here to announce the ban … the ban on couple shopping together at the grocery store. I know, you think “Oh it’s cute, we’re a couple and we’re shopping together,” but I’m gonna give you a harsh dose of reality … all you actually are is “in the way.”

Because it’s the same thing every time … You got a husband pushing a cart around with a totally lost look on his face. Like he was a caveman who just got unfrozen from a block of ice and the first thing they did was take him to the grocery store to move this metal basket with wheels around for cave lady wife. Then you have cave lady wife basically barking orders at the caveman and telling him what to do because he doesn’t know what they need or where anything is.

And the worst part … y’all are just in the way. The grocery store is not a place to walk around side by side. Grocery store aisles are a two lane street … one lane for each direction. And you two wandering minstrels are blocking traffic and slowly drifting thru life. Some of us just wanna buy some tortillas and get the heck out of here. This. This is why I ClickList.

Moving on Diary … Since I’m already in the world of groceries and food, can we all just band together and put an end to these stupid serving sizes that we let products get away with?

Take a container of broth for example (I know, very exciting, but it proves my point) … pretty much all containers of broth say, “contains about two cups.” About two cups? Why are we allowing that as an acceptable amount? Either be two cups, or don’t be two cups!

And furthermore, if you pour out that broth (which I have because I’m lame), you get one and three quarter cups. That’s not “about two cups,” that’s one and three quarter cups. I mean … if you have one and three quarter arms, I bet you don’t feel like you have “about two arms.”

Just put two cups in the container! Is that so hard?

Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye.