I Am Stupid

I Am Stupid

Dear Diary …

So here’s what I’m trying to figure out … Who’s stupid? Are we all getting stupider as a society? Or is it just me getting stupider?

Because man … I feel stupid these days. And I don’t know if its just that I’m gettin’ stupid because I’m getting older, or I’ve killed off all my brain cells, or like … COVID or something … but my head just don’t work right no more. God forbid you ask me to read something that’s longer than the label of a shampoo bottle because I can’t … focus. Maybe this is it for me? Maybe I’m on the downward spiral here?

You know what? NO! No I am not. I am fully capable of being a smarty pants, learning things, and remembering stuff. It’s simply that my (and everybody else’s) brain is a lazy, flabby lump that just doesn’t wanna work. Or even worse … it wants to just mess with you.

Think about when you need to remember something. I don’t know about you, but these days if I don’t put a reminder in my phone or on my calendar … it ain’t happening. Couple weeks ago there was some eclipse going on. And I’m a big ol’ dork and I like looking at things like that, so I wanted to check it out.

But at the same time … I’m a big ol’ STUBBORN dork and I decided, “No! I am NOT putting a reminder in my phone to go outside and watch this eclipse. I will NOT give into my brain and so help me GOD I’m gonna remember this!” Nope. Forgot. Not even the teeny tiniest inkling that night of “hey man … got anything you need to remember?”

And I knew my brain wasn’t gonna put in the work, but part of me didn’t care and just wanted to see if it would actually let me down yet again. And yes … yes it would.

But here’s the frustrating and annoying thing … I know darn well my brain CAN remember things. Because you know what I ALWAYS remember? Everything I put on my calendar.

I don’t even need the reminder or notification because my brain is all, “Duh! We knew that already … We don’t need any kind of reminder you idiot!”

But if there is no reminder?

[[[DUMMY SOUNDING MUSIC]]] “Boomp a doomp a doomp … I forgot! You know you should really set a reminder for me so I don’t forget.”

Why do we love screwing with ourselves so much? Screwing with other people? Totally get it! But why are we built to sabotage our own existence?

Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye.